Peter Pan Syndrome and the fear of growing up

Growing up can be harder for some people than others. Understand the relationship of Peter Pan Syndrome and its consequences in adult life.

Peter Pan Syndrome has been accepted in psychology since the publication of a book written in 1983, The Peter Pan Syndrome: Men Who Have Never Grown Up, written by Dr. Dan Kiley. wikipedia

Some characteristics of the disorder are the inability of individuals to take responsibility, to commit or to keep promises, excessive care with appearance and personal well-being, and a lack of self-confidence, even if they don't seem to show it and actually look exactly the opposite. In addition, they are constantly changing partners and looking for younger ones.

According to Kiley, the individual tends to show traits of irresponsibility, rebellion, anger, narcissism, dependence and denial of aging. Usually overprotected children acquire this disorder that can last a lifetime.

People with this condition feel dissatisfied with absolutely everything and do not take responsibility for their actions. Consequently, they may develop other disorders, such as anxiety, depression and problems with self-esteem.

The disorder was baptized with the name of Peter Pan because the attitude of people with this syndrome is exactly that of living in an imaginary world, where they do not have the obligation to age or mature. For this reason, they are not successful in their professional, family orlove relationships.

Several studies have found that this disorder is more common amongst men than women. What is most worrying is the growing incidence of cases diagnosed with the disorder.

It is worth mentioning that the Peter Pan complex is not listed in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders carried out by the American Psychiatric Association. The psychologist Dr. Dan Kiley was responsible for identifying and coining the term.

Peter Pan Syndrome: Diagnosis

It is possible to observe some personal characteristics to delimit the disorder.

In this sense, below are some characteristics that help to recognize someone who has this disorder:

* Insecurity;

* Low self-esteem;

* Interacting with younger people;

* Always making excuses for everything;

* Irresponsible;

* Dissatisfaction;

* Do not strive to achieve something;

* Selfish;

* They like to give orders and criticize;

* Need to get attention;

* They behave as they never grow old or mature;

* Cry easily.

Attitudes for fear of growing up

People with this syndrome appear arrogant, but hide a very great emotional fragility. Because they are also always in a world of fantasies, curiosity and creativity are sharpened.

They try hard and arouse some people's attention and admiration, because they seem to lead a light life. Although they always show great happiness, their mind is full of conflicts, fears and constant sadness. They are insecure, nervous, demanding, hurtful and intolerant.

Causes of Peter Pan Syndrome

There are numerous psychological factors that lead a person to develop this syndrome. In this sense, the disorder may occur due to factors that were triggered in childhood.

In this way, a very happy and complete childhood period can generate fear of growth or responsibility.

However, a disturbed childhood that was not well lived can also be the reason for the onset of the syndrome. In this case, there is a desire for the freedom of a child and the person does not accept that as an adult he will no longer be able to live it. Then, you will have to bury something you didn't enjoy, which creates an internal conflict.

Peter Pan Syndrome: Treatment

The most advisable thing is to seek adequate psychological or psychiatric treatment so that the patient can, in the first place, assume that he has the disease and seek, together with a professional, improvements and growth. Acceptance of the problem and the willingness to overcome it is the first and most important step in personal growth and healing.

Appropriate treatments will detect trauma and identify ways to overcome insecurity and immaturity, so that the person can freely overcome frustrations and assume their real world with joy and responsibility.

There is no reason to disconnect from what we were or lived when we were younger, what is needed is acceptance.

But if the past was traumatic and the fact that you didn't enjoy it as you should is what weighs, remember that a new phase of life is also something to enjoy and fill with accomplishments.

The most important thing is what we are today, and what we nurture to benefit in the future, always moving forward, never the other way around.

How to Deal with Someone with Peter Pan Syndrome

Living with a person who has this disorder may not be so easy. However, it is essential to know how to deal with someone who is going through this situation. Support is essential.

Family and close friends will continue your relationship with this person, so you need to know what to do when you are in an unpleasant situation.

Support needs to be constant, as it is necessary to remember that, often, the individual cannot control the way he is behaving. Therefore, empathy and patience are key to support.

In addition, encouragement and support for positive change is always important. This can be a little difficult at first, but those close to you can also help set an adult tone for someone with Peter Pan Syndrome.

If necessary, do not hesitate to seek professional help from competent therapists

IMPORTANT: We are Holistic Therapists and our treatment is alternative. Even with satisfactory results, it is essential to emphasize that only duly qualified doctors can diagnose diseases, indicate treatments and prescribe medication.

All the best.

See you next week

Shalom!

Debora and Daniel Wiseman